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July 12 Today’s Reading: Ecclesiastes 10-Song of Solomon 4
“I am sick of love.”
Song of Solomon 2:6
The Lord Jesus Christ has been most gracious to me. He has brought me into his church and family, and made me to be one of his own. He has made me, at various times, to sit down in blessed fellowship with him, feasting upon the rich and blessed truths of the gospel. His banner over me is love. My heart rejoices in his eternal, special, electing, immutable love for my soul. Still, my soul is weary. A heavenly love-sickness has come over me, because my blessed Lord and Redeemer, the great Lover of my soul, does not openly and clearly manifest himself as he has in days gone by.
How tedious and tasteless the hours,
When Jesus no longer I see;
Sweet prospects, sweet birds, and sweet flowers
Have all lost their sweetness to me.
“I am sick of love,” because I long for his presence. I know that Christ is always present with his church. Wherever two or three gather in his name, he is in their midst. I know that he is ever with me, that I am the apple of his eye. But, O my soul, how I long for his manifest presence, for him to make his presence known! My heart and soul yearns for a fresh and constant sense of his love. When he reveals himself, all is well. When he hides his face, everything seems empty and vain.
“I am sick of love,” because I long for his return. No man has a richer, fuller life than I. How gracious my God and Savior is and has been to his unworthy servant. But, oh, how I long for his return! The thought fills my soul with gladness, that one day the Lord Jesus Christ shall return to this earth. He will rid the world of his enemies. He will create all things new. In that blessed day, the knowledge of the Lord shall cover the earth as the waters cover the sea. Every person living upon the newly created earth shall worship, serve, and praise Christ; and all shall walk in the perfection of righteousness. Oh, may it please the King to return in his glory very soon. We long for him. — “Come quickly, Lord Jesus!”
“I am sick of love,” because I long to be with him. Is it not reasonable for the Lord’s people to long to be with him where he is? To be with him is to be free from sin. To be with him is to enter into rest. To be with him is to come into the glorious liberty of the sons of God. I will be content to remain here so long as he sees fit. But my heart has already departed. “I am sick of love.” — “To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord.” — “For we know that if our earthly house of this tabernacle were dissolved, we have a building of God, an house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens…We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord. Wherefore we labour, that, whether present or absent, we may be accepted of him. “
While I am here, I can be content, if he will give me the comfort of his grace. — “Stay me with flagons, comfort me with apples.” Though at times the Lord is pleased to withdraw his manifest presence, he has left behind the wine of his grace and the fruits of his labors to sustain my heart. These are the pillows of my soul. I rejoice in them. Yet, I long for my well Beloved. — “I am sick of love.” Child of God, is it not so with you?